Hi lovely friends!
I’m not sure who is reading this–maybe someone who knows me, maybe someone I have never met, or maybe someone who accidentally stumbled upon my page. To anyone who is reading this, though, I wanted to take this time to just be real with you and to share what is on my heart. This post may be a compilation of jumbled thoughts-so I apologize in advance-but I felt impressed to share it.
I started this blog as a creative avenue of expressing myself, as a way to capture the fleeting moments of motherhood with my baby girl, as a way to encourage myself to live a little more-soaking in ordinary moments, but also experiencing big ones. I started this blog because I wanted to share encouragement on marriage, my experiences on motherhood, my perspective on being a military wife, the spiritual things that move me and inspire me.
I want this blog to be refreshingly honest, encouraging and inspiring to all of you who read it. After starting, I haven’t uploaded posts consistently. I was having trouble figuring out what I wanted to write about. Words generally come pretty easy to me, so I was really frustrated with this writer’s block. I took some time to examine myself, and what was in my head and heart. Life changes so drastically after you have a baby and in a way that you really cannot prepare for. In the midst of gaining the new identity of ‘Mom,’ I definitely lost my identity as ‘Faith.’
Things that I had time for before I had a baby, were not so easy to do after having a baby. I’ve realized that if I want to be productive and truly get things done, I have to plan out my day. I have to be intentional with my time and create a list of priorities. Avary has and always will be my priority, but in those first several months, I was neglecting myself. I stopped reading my Bible, I didn’t pray consistently, I didn’t write or journal anymore. . . I had stopped taking time to just be quiet, reflect, think. . . If I took spare moments away from Avary, I felt a sense of guilt. I thought, ‘I’m a stay-at-home mom, I’m home all day with my baby. I’m so lucky. I shouldn’t need to take a break.’ But that thought cannot be farther from the truth. Being a stay-at-home mom is no less a job than the one my husband leaves home to do. Not to mention, it is a 24/7 job. I did need time to myself.
So within these last few weeks, I have recognized the importance of making time for myself. Even if it just a few minutes here and there. When I take time for myself-when I fuel my heart and my mind-I have so much more to give. I am not only a better mom, but a better wife and a better person. I am prioritizing time with God, first, because without that, I am a mess. Taking time to read a devotion, read my Bible, and journal my thoughts is where I will find clarity, strength to make it through baby-filled days, and inspiration to write here to all of you. . .
This morning I started writing in a new journal I picked up from Marshalls, (guys, I have a serious journal-fetish problem! I find a cute one and I have to buy it! And Marshalls never lets me down) and it had a Bible verse on the top of the page and it was Jeremiah 29:11, “For I know the plans I have for you declares the Lord, plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you a hope and a future.” I’ve heard that verse a million times, but I was sure that God wanted me to see that verse today and was speaking hope and truth into me. God placed a passion and a desire inside my heart to share my life in a blog, and I believe he has great plans for me and my future!
I say all that to let you know that I’m going to take you along this journey with me. I want to be honest, genuine and authentic with all of you, and if that means baring my heart, that’s what I’ll do.
I just want to encourage you that if you are in a place where you feel like you are pouring all of yourself into something or someone or someone(s), take a step back. Remember to invest in yourself so you have the energy and strength and grace and love to invest in others. And don’t forget that God has big plans for you, too!